Growing in Mature Love

My definition of falling in love with God and His people means that we give up our self and grow in selflessness. Mature love means finding your greatest joy in the joy of your loved one. 

When we talk about mature love, we can talk about the expression and the action of giving and receiving love in a strong, deep, and continuous manner. A mature and successful Christian love requires that we have this kind of love for both God and man. 

God has placed love in human hands. This gift has been forgotten, abused, and misused. We try to love God, but forget the people around us. We try to love people, but make idols out of them and forget God. We are drawn to collect and use things and forget both people and God. 

The greatest goal of the evil one is to draw us to anything but loving Jesus. The devil will work toward deepening our affections toward things and situations that we can control. He will tell us that God is both uncontrollable and unreliable. The conclusion is that God does not care about us and is therefore unlovable. The other side of this coin is that we are not worthy to receive God’s love. Both of these arguments prevent love from maturing and deepening for God and for our fellow man. 

I would like to discuss and point out some of the qualities of mature love. It is essential that we develop our relationship with God as our first priority. God is the source of all love and we can grow the fastest in love by practicing to love God every day. The Lord graciously accepts even our most simple and frail attempts to love Him because that is what we were created to do. 

When we desire to love God, we will receive more love for people. This will happen because of God’s faithfulness in pouring out His love to us. Love is a gift of God and not a creation of man. Love bears the most fruit as we trust in God to produce it. Man’s love is conditional love, but God’s love is unconditional love. Only unconditional love is mature love. 

Unconditional love means that we ask the Lord to help us love people as they are, not as we want them to be. Mature love comes to us when we continually consider what God wants us to do in our actions and thoughts toward other people. This kind of love brings us to a total act of commitment to love God and others with our hearts, bodies, and our spirits. We can give this kind of love to people but they will not always receive it. We are much more used to a string attached kind of love where we earn and therefore deserve someone’s affection. 

Mature love means that we think about and desire the time and affections of our beloved. This is true of our relationship with God and with people. Can we show that we yearn, long, and desire to be with those who we love? We can also choose to be in control and not be hurt or touched by God or by man. 

Mature love means that a part of us is missing when our loved one is not present. This also means that we feel secure and safe in our relationship even if our loved one is not with us. Mature love with God and with others gives us a vital sense of union, completion, and agreement with significant people in our lives. 

A mature love is a consuming love. It occupies our time, our attention, our talents, and our energy. This love is obvious to others in its intensity and its quality. It is consistently expressed in our thoughts and our actions toward our loved one. We will build up, encourage, and believe in those in whom we have a mature love. This kind of love generates faith, trust, hope, and life in others, and reveals the face of God to those whom we love. Mature love continues even when it is not evident that it is being expressed. Mature love embraces the weaknesses of our loved ones and rejoices their strengths. 

God is the source of mature love. He brings us through seasons of growth and change where He constantly reveals Himself. God wants us to love Him just because He is God, just as we like to be loved for being ourselves. The more we think about the one we love, the more we pray for them. Our Lord loves and thinks about us constantly. We will grow in mature love if we consistently desire God’s presence and dwell on His love for us. When we do this, there will be an outpouring of God’s love to others as we think of them. 

Falling and staying in love is a part of a mature love. Love means that we are willing to give up ourselves and become selfless to another person or persons. Mature love means that we become more like the character of Jesus. This kind of love is revealed when we find the most pleasure in the ways of God, and in the successes of those whom we love. Blessed is the person who finds their greatest joy in the joy of their loved one. 

Mature love means that we think about the other person without trying to control them. In mature love we give up every right except the right to become more like Jesus. This kind of love is not dictated by the behavior of others or by circumstances, or the desire to protect ourselves. The goal of this love is to make ourselves and others more like Jesus. The Holy Spirit will always move us toward this kind of love if we ask Him to do this for us. 

Mature love cannot be put in a box because it must be constantly able to adapt and grow. Too often we spend time wishing or wanting God or our loved one to be the way they were before. God is constantly maturing us. People need to have the freedom to be able to change and grow. In this way our love for God and for others will be a deeper and much fuller life. 

Mature love takes work and commitment. It is a lifestyle, and not a project. It takes the time that we might spend on acquiring things and accomplishments. Its treasures are often intangible, but very real. We cannot measure the joy of being with God, or with a loved one. 

Mature love is precious to those who experience it. It is a treasure beyond description. This kind of love exists in unity and more union with God and with one another. It is an unabashed, unashamed and without fear commitment. For what is foolish to the world, God has made to be wise.